Flying Away

It has been more than six months since I had flown to United States of America. I thought I will become sentimental about India, the moment I leave it. But it didn't happen. I became numb for a long time. May be Will Durant's philosophy has killed all primeval emotions in me :-) (that's just to show that I am a cool philosopher now :-P). I stopped over for a few hours in China, but did not feel that curiosity that I felt while reading about it in Nehru's letters to Indira. Somehow everything looks very mechanical, according to the script, according to Will Durant's script :-).

Will Durant, I have been reading his Story of Civilization for a few months now. I used to think that the most interesting story is the story of man, the rise and fall, the evolution from nothing to something and then to everything. Someday I will cross 7 oceans to see his grave and thank him for all the enlightenment, just like Robespierre did when he made a secret visit to ailing philosopher 200 years ago.

The more, time passes by, the more I feel an unexplainable unrest in me. I feel a philosophical emptiness in this foreign land.

Secularism

Everybody claim to be secular in India, according to their definition of course. The unfortunate thing about democracy is that there is no easy way of telling who is right and who is wrong. Modern idea of secularism in India is a complex outcome of fusion of western idea of completely neutral state and an old culture of assimilation and acceptance. And Indian secularism is the most visible outcome of India's independence movement. Communalism was identified as the cause for some of the most regretted events in 20th century in India. So strong was this feeling that, there was a near unanimous agreement among intellectuals and politicians to suppress the currents of communalism with iron fist.

Being secular is a cultural concept where as secularism is a political prescription to guide the state's attitudes towards people for its continued existence. It is interesting to observe the history of secularism. Secularism has two distinct connotations. On the one hand, according to principles that guide most European governments it means that the state has no religion. It is as if the state doesn't even acknowledge the existence of religion. On the other hand, according to many developing multi-religious nations(like India), it means that the state respects all religions equally. European prescription on secularism is a passive one, recommending ignorance of religion. Where as, Indian prescription for secularism is a recommendation to actively treat all religions equally. The difference is so subtle, it represents the difference in evolution of nation states in the west and the east. Western nation states emerged fighting the autocratic monarchies and the illogical restrictions imposed by god and his representatives. Inquisition and the role of church had been identified as the major forces that kept humanity in dark age before the renaissance and the age of enlightenment. Widespread violence accompanied the Wars that were fought over religions. So weary were Europeans of the violence and suppression of ideas by church that they gradually sidelined it completely in their laws. Today in the west, one can mock a God, make fun of a religion and yet can claim it to be part of their right to freedom of speech.

But, the Indians didn't have that much religious violence for that long time. Religions, being moderate have coexisted with little or no violence and religion was not identified as the sole reason for stagnation in the society. On the contrary intellectuals tended to identify an Indian's soul in his religion. That's why Indian state couldn't remove religion from public life, despite so many godless men having been ruled it.

Nirvana

"A first sign of the beginning of understanding is the wish to die. "
--Franz Kafka


In school days, doordarshan TV serials and a generation old movies always depicted an unforgettable theme, that of a yogi doing prayers in the woods or in the rocks and getting Moksha. Even text books talked about how puranas, itihasas and the mighty upanishads talked about getting Moskha as the ultimate aim of any individual. Buddhas's nirvana was another word, that I heard so many times but never once understood what it means (other than that it is a cool word to use once in a while :-)).

The essence behind all these catch words is the concept of transmigration, as an immortal soul migrating from one body to another after death, and the highest aim of an individual should be to get out of this cycle of rebirth. Why do we think soul migrates from one body to another, I still haven't figured out. But I now realize the idea behind avoiding cycle of rebirth. I now see why learned men have no sympathies for human life and day to day toil for existence. After all, one cannot miss the reality of our struggles in a soulless world. And after gaining certain knowledge of history and causes of events around us, seeing the inevitable in front of our eyes, one cannot fail to realize our meaningless existence in this meaningless world.

To counter this skepticism and hopeless existence some learned men have offered religion as hope giver to the ignorant. More than everything, religion gives a man a reason to live, something to aspire for, something to look forward in the future. But what of irreligious men like me, I sense no God to protect me, to bless me, to guide me, to bring good days for me. I am alone to fight a tearful battle in a heartless world. Now I see why ignorance is a bliss, and why that religious fundamentalist in a remote village enjoys his life more than these so called modern people like me, struggling to find out a reason for their existence.

With this background, the whole concept of suicide now becomes as significant as death itself. I now see a raison d'être for the philosphy of suicide and I think it's the right time to find out what Camus had said on suicide.